07/13/2026
๐จ BREAKING NEWS ๐จ
Well... this wasn't exactly part of the marketing budget.
Early this morning, reports started coming in of a massive crop circle just outside Hopkins. Local experts are calling it "unexplainable." Our marketing team is calling it "great exposure."
If you happen to see a UFO parked near the Alley Jam on Saturday, July 18th from 2โ10 PM, just know they're probably here for:
๐ค Mechanical Bull
๐ฝ $300 Co****le Tournament
๐ฎ Food from Nacho's & The Wild Boar
๐ธ Live Music
๐ถ Late-night with Gen X Jukebox
At this point, the marketing campaign has officially gotten out of hand.
All Day. Alley Action. Even if it takes extraterrestrial marketing to make it happen. ๐ฝ๐ธ๐ป