06/09/2026
I started watching the video that has been circulating from a local Onalaska restaurant, and honestly, I could not stomach finishing it.
I am a woman who has spent my entire adult life in the restaurant industry, as a server, chef, and now as a business owner. I have worked in incredible kitchens where people treated each other with respect, communicated well, and built strong teams.
I have also worked in kitchens where I was told I was “lucky” to receive benefits because “women cost more money than men.” I have been blatantly discriminated against and treated differently than my male counterparts. Unfortunately, many women in this industry have stories like this.
What I keep coming back to is this: staff culture starts with leadership.
If employees are struggling, inattentive, emotional, overwhelmed, or unsupported, that is not a reason to demean them. It is a sign that leadership needs to look at training, communication, expectations, and management. When people in leadership speak about female employees in vulgar, discriminatory, and degrading ways, it does not just hurt those women, it lowers the standard for our entire industry.
I believe we can do better. I believe difficult conversations can lead to better understanding, better education, and better workplaces. I would welcome a serious conversation with anyone in our industry about how we raise the bar and move away from the negative kitchen culture that too many people have experienced.
I am sharing this because our community deserves to know what kind of language and attitudes are being used behind the scenes, especially toward women in the workplace.
Women belong in this industry.
Women belong in leadership.
Women deserve respect, professionalism, and equal treatment.
And as business owners, managers, chefs, and community members, we should all be willing to hold that standard.
Jen Barney, Owner of Meringue Bakery
Story link in the comments 🔽
